So Happy She Loves Me...

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-02-01T16:56:00

2005-02-01T22:03:03Z

well..im ungrounded..this feels nice. lol

today was ok....the morning was a little depressing i have no idea why. not 2 mention a certain 2 ppl were mean to me today...but its ok...cuz rigfht now? im cuddling up with the blanket that harrison DOESNT have! but yea....it sux cuz i cant torture him anymore....dammit..o well...there are...ways *looks around suspiciously*

haha. anyway...thinking about my party...actually thinking about lotsa stuff....AHHH! i get to spend an upcoming weekend with brian when my parents go to daytona! im so excited!!!! but sadly...hes only got a few more weeks here...the end is drawing near and im terrified...*sobs uncontrollably*

well what do i expect u kno? ok well feel free to IM me..IM NOT GROUNDED!

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-02-01T05:40:00

2005-02-01T10:41:08Z

IM OFFICIALLY MOTHER FUCKING UNGROUNDED!

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-30T14:35:00

2005-01-30T19:44:06Z

life is crazy. actually there is only one other time in my life that i was unable to think clearly, to make a decision, to choose, to understand, to love. i think the only positive thing i kno, understand, and love-is Laurens hapiness..i think of all the incoherancy and the confusion and then, i take a few seconds and look at the ppl around me, see how happy she is....and i cant help but smile. My liar theory has been put into play and u kno, i never really saw how significant it actually was. but WOW...there are so many goddamned liars..everywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sry, im just pissed...skool 2moro...oh the joy.

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-28T18:10:00

2005-01-28T23:13:13Z

lmfao.... look at this..at this...DIRTY VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahaa Dorna let us laugh at the master vagina:

S   eabull   S: y were u laughing
S   eabull   S: hoe
NeEdHeLp1012: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *dies*
S   eabull   S: shut your bologna flaps and tell me
NeEdHeLp1012: i dont eat meat
NeEdHeLp1012: sry
S   eabull   S: ... you dont get it
NeEdHeLp1012: no i get it
NeEdHeLp1012: duh
NeEdHeLp1012: stop being such a dirty vagina whittaker
S   eabull   S: ...
S   eabull   S: ok
NeEdHeLp1012: lol
S   eabull   S: lol itd be funny if they had an AP class liek AP carpet munching
S   eabull   S: we were talking about that at lunch today
S   eabull   S: g2g
NeEdHeLp1012: lol
NeEdHeLp1012: ok bye
S   eabull   S: if you ever look at me again and laugh ill break your other arm
S   eabull   S: hoebag
S   eabull   S is away at 6:07 P.M.

I really like the part where he kills himself. Dorna I think whitt needs a douche for his vagina....HAHAHAHAHAHA (were laughing at u whitt!)

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-26T21:03:00

2005-01-27T02:20:22Z

just thinking of the life i used to live....and how things are seeming to be a repetition. im talking the same talk, taking the exact same strides i used to, acting the same, thinking the same...and yet...the people around me seem to be from a dream...like im living in a constant deja vu. I think things a certain way to hide the misery...or make myself stand out to be noticed when all i want is to be left alone. The people I thought were real are only pallid energy of which i walk through every time I speak, whimper, utter a sound...

I speak to be heard, but I only wish to be silent.
I stand there to be helpful, when I'm the one who needs help.
I stand out to be noticed, but I only hide behind a facade.
I cry when I'm sad, but truth be told its the only thing that makes me feel better.
I cry out in pain, when really, its the only thing I want.
I begged to be loved....but I've had it all along.

There is someone the above is dedicated to...and you kno who you are...your comments mean everything to me... your words are the only ones I hang to...your love is the only thing i ask for...but alas, I'm lucky enough because you love me.

well now

2005-01-25T10:25:37Z

im just sitting here eating my life cereal contemplating the meaning of life...where am i going? Am I doing the right things? well nvm that one, we all kno thats a ...no. But what can I do to fix it. All the things I play myself out to be reminds me of msoa...I mean...I feel myself living this parody, this illusion that remains a figment of my aimless imagination-and its entraping me..engulfing me to no avail. And now I'm stuck. I thought I had something going that would make my life easier..but um...guess what? Once again the "I told you so"s are echoing in the back of my mind. Once again I realize that I am no longer just surrrounded by liars, but that I have become one. I am the person that I've grown up hating my whole life. I have become a spitting image of my enemy.

I want to apologize to everyone for the foolish way I've been acting. Any promises of the latter are still to be withheld if I say so, but if not, then don't worry, a promise is a promise. You know I really hate these journals...there are days where I just want to talk directly to one person, or just to a group of ppl...then there are days where I just want to talk to myself...but I feel that I can't reveal names, dates, places, ect..because I would be hurting only myself. I have to go to skool...so...with that I'll leave you with a poem I wrote:

Im standing quietly; discretely. Translucent in sunless air. I am a pallid light, struggling against opaque intricate flows of nothingness, submerged in an elegant numbness so profound, it's ground into me like dust that never settles.The stillness has nothing more than a pale sympathy to offer. An endless indistinct nullity, indifferent to my suffering. Isolation displays an extravagant rhythmic grace. a certain purity and purpose in its stoic elaborations: leaving something of a ghost in its wake. I am the final silence, a nebulous stone effigy sustained by fragments of memories; dining on shaded echoes of thoughts others want to forget. Discarded, dislocated moments with no connection to anyone- they nourish with little there is left of me. I am synthetic, artificial. Blown about like paper. Only experiencing love through proxy. Stealing touches meant for others.I have no one to cherish as my world dissolves around me. I will die, and when I die, it will be in the manner in which I've lived. With my regrets sundering into frail faded whispers.

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-23T17:02:00

2005-01-23T22:10:38Z

DAAMMITTT!!! lmao and i thought that id never again have to post in this stupid thing because i figured i wouldnt get that many comments...but...ok. you guys have missed soooo much. so much shit has happened, good and bad...best day of my life..who i spent it with? they kno. craziest day? today. with matt and chris...MAN those guys are psycho!!!!!

im really glad that laur came over today...to help me celebrate my last day of freedom! even alan came over. theres only one person (jew!!!!!) that didnt come over..which sucked because lauren really wanted him to. but hey! laurens got a crush on..well...someone! yay! im going to set them up. woohoo!! ok well everyones grounded for like... ever..me and alan and matt..yay! haha. anyways i have LOADS of homework, so...call the cell if ur bored.... 329 8746!

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-13T21:27:00

2005-01-14T02:27:56Z

Hey Im taking Laurens idea and Im not posting until I get 60 comments.

bye bye then

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-13T16:34:00

2005-01-13T21:52:27Z

Theres so much going on inside my head..inside my family...(inside my body) lol jk...anyway theres too much to tell, so ill stick to recent events. skool is alot better thanx to 2 certain ppl *cough coughhareandwillcough cough* but yea...thanx guys. plus, ive been getting comments on my cool clothes. ha. anywho...

last night hare came to get his sweater that i stole for him and we ended up going back to his place. thats its. lol no..but we walked to his neighborhood where he jumped on this girls trampoline..which was a jump for me...but back into my past. We kept walking and he while we walked along the canal he told me everything that happened with him and his friends and where, which was cool, I got to kno somemore about him. Then he showed me his old hang out above the canal and it was pretty kickass. We called matt and he came out so we met him by his house and then walked back to the hang out. Hares mum called so he had to leave for dinner, so matt walked me to the end of the canal and then I walked home. It was cool...at least my mum will let me hang out with hare...so..yea..its awesome..hare you'll have to come over more often..(how bout everyday? lmao) anywho...o MATT!!!!! *makes angry face* I kno about the bet thing and your going to lose and hares going to win. I kno I said otherwise, but...now that I kno, I'm not just gonna LET you win. so..no money for you. there. lmao...hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...

in other news...this is the funniest thing ive heard all day

NAME DISCLOSED: i measured my penis
NAME DISCLOSED: its 2 and a half inches fully erect
NAME DISCLOSED: is that big?

*dies laughing* that is funny. so goddamned funny it hurts.

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-09T22:29:00

2005-01-10T02:52:04Z

"Reluctance encompasses me like inaudible words not uttered. All I can hear are screams, all I can see is blood, all I can smell is fear. You are ignorant and blind, stupid and cold-your heart like the rocks that the waves of my violence beat upon. Don't cry, I'll be here to help you end this. We'll do this together. I would never leave you alone. Feel my fingers as I run them through your hair. Feel my breath on the back of you neck as I quietly whisper sweet malevolence.Shiver as the cold steel touches your temple or as the edge lightly caresses the opaque intriquitness that is your pale skin. Feel my tongue as I run it down your cheek, licking the beauty dripping from the array of wounds. And as you stare up at me-a ghastly notion sweeping across that pretty face of yours- do not forget that I have always loved you."

^^Spur of imagination I presume. But yea. I wrote it. About Lauren lol...yea...im psycho.

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-04T14:05:00

2005-01-04T19:05:57Z

Post anything that you want (in the comments), BUT post it ANONYMOUSLY. It can be anything. A story, a secret, a confession, a fear, a love -- anything. Be sure to post Anonymously and Honestly. Post twice or 40 times if you'd like.

Then, put this in your LJ to see what your friends (and perhaps others who you don't even realize read your LJ) have to say. But please post.

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-03T13:07:00

2005-01-03T18:28:51Z

If we were all the same, where would we be? If we all said the same things, what would be said? If we all did the same things, what would be accomplished? How is it that we all walk the same, talk the same, dress the same, act the same, sound the same-as if the world keeps a steady repetition like the beating of a heart? Why is it that we feel the need to say what we feel when it only stabs us in the back? Or say what they want to hear when it only comes back to haunt us? Why, why, why? Why do these questions in my head keep pounding me? Why is everyone asking the same questions if there are no answers? Why do we seek them then? What are we waiting for? Someone once said to me "the only thing you want is the one thing you can't have". Why not? Why can't I have my cake and eat it too? Why does life seem so bereft of clarity and placidity and complacency? Why do we do the things we hate? Why do it if we only come to hate ourselves, or hate those around us, or even hate those that tried to help us? If such a meanial feeling such as this could be solved, why leave it to stand still? If the solace is that of death, why stay alive? If a person places a burden unto your shoulders, why keep it there? Why not give it back? Is it because our egotistical psyches have too much confidence that we choose to be independent and alone? Is it because we feel we have nothing to give, so we have to take what is given? Why do we stand there and let others walk over the people you love or would you rather it be the people you hate. Wasnt it once said to "love your enemies as you would your family. Love the enemies of your enemies because they will be the catalyst of their demise."? Why then do we love our enemies? Arent we just lying to suffice our need to be accepted and wanted and looked up to? Is there a continuous circle of lies that we spread to everyone, which in turn they then spread-creating an entire lifetime of lying and cheating and stealing and hardships? If we all were lying, would it be to ourselves or others? What then is the definition of truth? What could be classified as truth? If one says "Believe me" with the scenario based on a lie, would that not be a lie as well? If everyone is a liar, is there evil within everything? Or is lying good? Do we say what others want to hear and make them feel better or lift a weight off the shoulders of a listener, does that make it wrong? How big does a lie have to be to be bad? If it hurts no one is it bad? If it hurts everyone is it bad? How can we punish a liar if we ourselves are among that category--we too are the liars. And to say you are different, that you are not of this section-you are lying.

I will shut up now.

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2005-01-02T09:13:00

2005-01-02T14:16:09Z

ok i gotta make this good...HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yea..i had a kick ass weekend thanx to steph..ill never forget it stephy! its only one more crazy weekend to add to our many memories..good and bad...but hey this summer, virginia here we come lol... but yea..i hope everyone has a great rest of the break i love you guys.

laur- when i get out we have some stuff to talk about...but by the time we talk ill have forgotten i was mad at you. but hey w/e. dont forget me or think i dont love you.

dre-dont call because im on house arrest (actually no one call please)

chuck-i love you and im sorry it has to be this way

tom- man o man i really want to talk to you but i dont kno when i can...hopefully soon ill go to ft. laurderdale...we'll hang out if i can

and anyone else who cares enough to read or comment (theres not many lol)....i love you guys, hopefully we can talk in march. hah.

and for my last entry i leave you with two quotes:

"Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it.
Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it.
Hatred darkens life; love illumines it. "

thank you to all who have loved me, all who have helped me..but most importantly, all who have been there to share with me memories of the past.

and the last one:

"The first duty of love is to listen"

you guys have sat there staring blankly at your computer screen trying to understand my life and why im so weird...and whats going on...and just, well, stuff you could really care less about. but you listen. yes. you. reading this right now. i love you.

~save a kiss for me~
alex

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-29T20:34:00

2004-12-30T01:45:15Z

Everyone has plans on how they want their life to fan out and everyone has a general idea of what they want to do, accomplish, or fail at in life. One person told me the following were his life ambitions:

1.get laid
2. have a 3 some
3. have an orge
4. swallow a sword
5. have sex on parents bed
6. have sex with a famous person
7. have sex with a person from a different race
8. have sex for 24 hours straight
9. star in a porno
10. fall in love and settle down
11. have sex in front of the children
12. die having sex
13. make sure some chick has sex with his dead body
14. wants his penis to be displayed in a porno museum

wow...what a life to lead. haha. to the person who said this-i will not disclose your name to anyone, but hey..you are one of the most kick ass ppl ive ever met :)
*kisses* <3 alex

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-29T15:13:00

2004-12-29T20:20:25Z

yo bitches! how goes it? hah

today i went thrifting with my nana...for anyone who doesnt kno what thrifting is: going to thrift stores, second time around stores, goodwills, ect to find old clothes and jewelery to make them new. It was fun! I got 4 or 5 new outfits I'm gonna restore...i have pants to sew and buttons to put on and I have to clean them up a bit, but heck, they'll look as good as new! I didnt find too much cool jewels but I did buy 2 new pairs of earrings...and guess how much all of this stuff was? $16!!!! heck yea thats what im talking about. But yea, so then me and her went to lunch at Dave's right by Derrick's old house which got me thinking about how he's doing over in minnesota and stuff, not to mention the memories of him being a jackass and spending 20 minutes at the atm machine (with about 5 or 6 ppl behind us) and him not being able to do it, but then realizing we were at the wrong bank. haha. dumbass. but yea. so now im home and thank god my dads not home, but hes so pissed at my mum i doubt he'll be home soon :)

*sigh* i dno if i can go out anymore this break because my mum FINALLY discovered my c in bio....so...sorry everyone. This sux...that means no new years eve party with steph or hanging out with alan or going out with my brother. DAMN DAMN DAMN. o well..its only another marking period of no computer and no phone and no friends and w/e. bye

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-28T18:03:00

2004-12-28T23:03:46Z

Long Survey(over 100)
Created by shortie5123 and taken 425 times on bzoink!
~¤~Basics~¤~
Name:	Alex
Sex:	yes please!
Birthday:	may 27th
Eye color:	brown
Hair color:	changes all the time
Height:	5'3
Age:	14
Birthplace:	Seaside Park, New Jersey
Parents names:	Alex and Chris
Any siblings?	Yes
How many?	4
Pets?	yes
How many?	lots
What kind?	dog, snake, iguana
!~Favorites~!
Color?	orange
Article of clothing?	ones that fit
movie?	the 10th kingdom
song?	truly madly deeply
t.v. show?	the o.c.
Actor?	josh hartnett
Actress?	nicole kidman
drink?	mountain dew
food?	chinese
candy bar?	any is fine
brand of gum?	orbit
class?	geometry (harrison!!)
sport?	soccer
hobby?	reading slash
<~>FrIeNdS<~>
Who are your best friends?	Lauren, Andrea, Hare, Derrick, Stephy, Ang, Seb
Favorite?	hmm lol..they kno
Cutest?	SEEEEBBB!!!!
funniest?	Hare & Ang
smartest?	Laur
weirdest?	Andrea
loudest?	Derrick
dumbest?	um...
quietest?	steph!
meanest?	derrick
closest to you?	laur
best at keeping secrets?	ang
easiest to talk to?	hare
hang out with the most?	laur
(¤)>LoVe<(¤)
Do you have a crush?	yep
Do you have a b/f or g/f?	yep
Are you in love or like with he/she?	yep
What do you love least about he/she?	tell me their flaws and I'll justify them
What do you love most about he/she?	everything
Do you get jealous when he/she talks about another boy/girl?	nope
Do you want to have sex with he/she? Have you?	yes
Does he/she write you poetry?	i dno
Do they tell you how much they love you?	all the time
Do you wish you were with someone else?	nope
Do you wish this person looked different?	nope
Do you think this person is hott?	yep
Has he/she ever hurt you? cheated?	nope
Do you wanna marry him/her?	yep
~This OR That~
McDonalds/Burger King:
Hamburger/Hotdog:	neither ew
Dr. Pepper/Mountain Dew:	m.d 4 life
Fries/Tater Tots	fries
Christina/Britney?	theyre both sluts
Love/lust?	depends what day it is
Pink/Blue:	pink!! :)
Nike/Kswiss:	neither
school/work:	school
mom/dad:	mum
sister/brother:	brother
gold/silver:	silver
chocolate/vanilla:	vanilla
coffee/capuccino:	coffee
¤¤¤DO YOU¤¤¤
drink?	yes
smoke?	not anymore
cuss?	yes
sing well?	so ive been told
dance well?	i guess
like school?	sometimes
Think you NEED a b/f or g/f?	i dont need one per say but im glad i have one
Date often?	not anymore
Talk to yourself?	all the time
Shower every day?	yep
Want to get married?	yep
Want to go to college?	yep
Want to have kids?	yep
Get along with your parents?	sometimes
!~!LaSt!~!
kiss?	god...
Hug?	this morning...my mum!
Car ride?	to blockbuster
food consumed?	spicy chicken
shoes worn?	flip flops
time showered?	yesterday
phone call?	to alan today
song heard?	creed
tv show you watched?	dno
movie seen in theatre?	sponge bob
person talked to?	my mum
person that e-mailed you?	no one ever emails me
time you laughed?	during the passion of the christ today
curse word you said?	shit
<~PRESENT~>
What are you listening to?	the tv in the background
Who are you talking to?	chuck and lauren
Who are you waiting on?	no one
Who do you wish will come?	he knows...
What do you want to be doing?	we all kno that one ;)
Are you hungry?	yes
Are you thirsty?	yes
Do you feel loved?	yes
Do you want to go to the mall?	yes
Do you need a hug?	yeessssss
Do you feel hated?	nope
Is this a good survey?	just long
Do you like this survey?	not really lol
Are you glad that this is the last question?	eh well...im bored
Create a Survey \| Search Surveys \| Go to bzoink!

HAPPY BDAY TO ALAN!

2004-12-28T13:59:39Z

ahhhhh!

I'm sick.

This sucks.

I feel dead.

Anywho...I think its like the 28th...today is alans bday so HAPPY BDAY ALAN!!!! I'm going to the mall today and then im going to Borders and then to Ross...on wednesday I'm going to go thrifting with my nana. Thursday (hopefully) I'm gonna go hang out with alan and friday I think I'll call steph and see if we can hang. Over the weekend I might get together with kendall, monday I want to hang with angie, tuesday night I might call mikey and see if he wants to catch a movie...then I dno what else..does anyone else want to hang out? Leave a comment if you do, I'm not psychic :)

anywho...today I need to get a new calendar, the next couple books of fruits basket, burt's chapstick, a new suit for court, and well...I think that's it...I dont really need anything else, not to mention that the lines everywhere will be horrendous. so yea, thats it for the agenda today and this week, im sick. its just blah. hope everyone is doing great. *kisses*

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-27T11:22:00

2004-12-27T16:22:05Z

Your Beauty lies
in Contradiction. Controversial, unpredictable, and
never what anyone expects.
You appearance and your personality are two
opposite things. Even your
appearance sends different signals to different
people. To some you may look
innocent and sweet, to others you look mysterious
and intimidating at the same
time. No one ever knows what to expect with you.
You are a little bit of
everything all mixed together. You can be watching
the football game with the
guys one minute and the next out shopping at the
mall. You seem to be almost a
different person every time you meet someone, but
at the same time you know
exactly who you are and there is always that one
thing that makes you you. You
enjoy keeping people guessing and people love how
completely unpredictable you
are.

Some Things
That Represent You:

Element:
Fire, Water Animal: Chameleon Color:
Dark Tones, Light
Tones Song: Everything by Alanis Morriesette
Expression:
Half-smile

Gemstone:
Opal Mythological Creature: Gryphon,
Half-breeds Planet: Mars Hair
Color: Red Eye Color:
Brown

Quote:
"Appearances can be deceiving."

Where Does Your Beauty Lie? ..::Original Pictures Are Back! Detailed Results::..
brought to you by Quizilla

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-27T11:01:00

2004-12-27T16:02:25Z

this was sent to me, so im doing it for the heck of it..but..ive already found the perfect guy :)

The Perfect Guy
Created by madhatter and taken 8176 times on bzoink!
Hair color?	black
Eye color?	blue/green
Height?	taller than me
Six pack?	doesnt matter
Long hair or short?	long
Glasses?	no
Piercings?	yes
Eyebrows?	uh..yes?
Big butt or little?	doesnt matter
Chest hair?	lol
Buff or skinny?	buff
Teeth?	hopefully
Section 2
Funny or serious?	funny
Party-hopper or more stay-at-home?	party hopper
Should he be able to bake or cook?	yea
Does he have a best friend?	yea
Is it okay for him to have a lot of female friends?	sure
Out-going or shy?	out going
Sarcastic or sincere?	a little of both
Does he love his mother?	sometimes
Should he watch chick-flicks?	yes
Would he be a smoker?	doesnt matter
How about a drinking?	yes
And swearing?	yes
Would he play with your hair?	yes
Would he have more than one girlfriend at a time?	no
Would he pay for you when you're on a date?	sometimes
Does he kiss on the first date?	yes
Where would you go for dinner?	a la restraunt du coin
Would he buy you flowers?	if he wanted to
Would he lay under the stars with you and spout random philosophies?	yes
Would he write poetry about you?	yes
Would he use endearments?	yes
Would he hang out with your and YOUR friends?	yes
How about you hanging out with him and HIS friends?	awesome
Would he walk you up to the door at the end of the evening?	yes
Would you hold hands?	yes
Section 3
Does he play soccer?	yes
Baseball?	no
Football?	yes
Basketball?	no
Water polo?	no
Golf or something equally boring?	no!!!!
Does he surf?	that or learning
Skateboard?	yes
Snowboard?	yes
Can he sing?	yes
Play the guitar?	yes
Play piano?	yes
Play the drums?	no
Can he keep his room clean?	no
Is he an artist of sorts?	no
Does he write his own music?	yes
Does he have pets?	yes
Section 4
Does he use the word dude?	lol no
How about tight?	no
Would he watch the sun rise and set with you?	everyday
What kind of car does he drive?	one that runs
How old is he?	legal
What's his name?	one i can tease him about
Create a Survey \| Search Surveys \| Go to bzoink!

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-26T13:30:00

2004-12-26T18:30:27Z

lmao!!! this is an email i got from t-shirt hell today:

Twas the night before Christmas, and back at my mansion;
My dog was balls deep, in young Scarlett Johansson

Three teenage runaways all chained to my bed,
Two sucked my tits, while the last gave me head;
The handcuffs were chafing, their collars on tight,
I warmed up the cattle prod for a long night.

A call from security disrupted my screwing;
An alarm had gone off, and some trouble was brewing.
I went to my monitor, scanned the estate.
The intruder was visible on camera eight.

A fat load of crap in a fuzzy red suit,
In a queer little sleigh with his bag full of loot.
Eight tiny reindeer the color of fawn;
This would be the last year they would shit on my lawn.

The hookers and runaways would just have to wait,
While I did what I did to protect my estate.
When I got to my parlor I saw Santa there;
My bodyguards had him strapped down to a chair.

They had beat him severely, they couldn't avoid it.
And Santa they said, well he rather enjoyed it.
"I came for your help," he told me with a tear;
"You're the only one who can save Christmas this year."

"We are so much alike, I know that much is true;
Since you also spread joy; just as much as I do.
I give everyone presents I don't ask to get paid
Is it so much to ask that I want to get laid?"

"A blumpkin! a donkey punch! the old Cleveland steamer!
Mrs. Claus is too old, and she won't let me ream her!"
I sympathized with the old guy this was true;
But there were some things (and some guys) that I just wouldn't do.

"I'll help the old dude" said a voice from behind me,
He looked over my shoulder and said, "Thank-you kindly!"
So, who would I thank for last minute salvation?
Why young Scarlett Johansson (from Lost in Translation)

Santa was thrilled and he did a quick dance
With a gleam in his eye and a tent in his pants.
She dropped to her knees and she spit on her hand,
As she undid his belt something happened, unplanned.

At the touch of her fingers he moaned and he farted;
And Santa was finished before he had started.
And Scarlett was literally covered in goo;
Like a young blade of grass in the fresh morning dew.

But more like a birthday cake covered in frosting;
Poor Santa collapsed the whole thing quite exhausting.
Scarlett licked her full lips and she said, "it's quite chalky."
"It's lucky for you that I'm into bukkake."

Well, Santa got up and he brushed off his suit,
As she licked the last drops of his seed off his boot.
Then Santa said, "Sorry, I guess one thing's clear:
It's that Santa should come more than one time a year."

But I heard him exclaim ere he drove out of sight,
Merry Christmas to all, and buy a gift certificate at
www.tshirthell.com, tonight.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-26T13:16:00

2004-12-26T18:24:51Z

"say a pray for me im in need of your faith now i was afraid maybe im just scared to face the things i fear its easier to walk away from everything"

*sings along with walk away by good charlotte*

GAH!!! im bored...but then again, thats nothing new right? im bored out of my ass. i STILL cant get my ipod to work but then again im a loser. so ok. anywho, Last night I couldnt get to sleep until like 2 and then i woke up at 7:30 and my whole body hurt, my throat, my stomach, my neck, my muscles...so i got up and jumped into the shower hoping it would help...i stayed in the hot, steamy, skin burning water for what seemed like eternity hoping I wouldnt feel like shit all day...so i got out and doubled over cause i felt like i was gonna barf..so i walked slowly to my bed holding my stomach and my mum brought me meds...i went out to the couch and tried to get more comfortable...but it didnt work, so i went into my parents room and instantly fell asleep, waking up at noon...I woke up and I look like I've just been hit by a bus and I walk out into the kitchen and like...all my dads friends are over lol....Shake was like "whoa...its up" so i flipped him off and went into my room to get dressed...then alan called...so here i am..sitting here...bored, but feeling a little bit better. Boxy is the only one not here and the only one i really wanted to hang out with today. What a dumbass. I'll beat the shit out of him...lmao..jk

~ ive gotta stop talking to myself~
alex

MERRYYYYYYY XMAS!!!!!!!!

2004-12-25T18:11:01Z

WOW!!! its christmas! Unbelievable eh? Well...I'm bored. I opened my xmas presents (all 3 of them lol) completely over joyed and surprised----jk...i actually picked them out haha. i wonder what every one else got...i kno sonni got coal...i kno chuck got gift certificates and stuff...but yea! I'm eating dinner with the family tonight, so that'll be fun...i think ima hang out with laur and alan next wednesday...hmm...i really have nothing to say but everyone have a great holiday and i love you! *mwah*

~tell me you love me~

alex

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-24T10:29:00

2004-12-24T15:36:09Z

Yesterday was cool...my last two easy exams!! thank GOD its over! i accidentally forgot to give drea her present from whitt, so she came and got it lol..and then well..I HAD SO MUCH FUN LAST NIGHT! lol...I finally saw lauren for like the first time in many months, which I missed..Kyles friend colton wanted to have sex with me as I was talking to chuck on the phone..so..that was eh..weird. It was cool tho..then this morning I watched bella and taylor and anthony open their presents..bella is the cutest thing ever! Mum picked me up and now I'm just sittin here. Soon I have to go over to my nanas and clean her house cause she comes here tonight. I was thinking of calling my bro and ask if he wants to come over for dinner...I cant believe tommorrows Christmas!! Thats crazy! Ah well..have a happy one everybody! *kisses*

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-23T04:27:00

2004-12-23T09:32:34Z

well...its 4:28 am...and im tired..I should actually be getting something to eat or rather studying..but no. I get online to make sure I keep tabs on everyone else's life lol. I'm bored tho..Today I have my french exam and my english exam *runs and go gets something for english she forgot from her room* ok anyway yea so exams. I have a half day today..then im going to come home and hopefully sleep...or eat...or something. I dno yet. I may go caroling with lauren if shes still doing it, but I just dont kno....I dont seem to kno much. O well. >.< I'll chat with everyone later.

Oh and btw dre-I love your gift, you're a great friend and i love you!

xpenis_wrinklex @ 2004-12-22T19:29:00

2004-12-23T00:29:07Z